The most important commodity of life is something that is intangible-time. We all wish we had more time. Time to get work done, time to relax, time to sleep, time to spend with friends and family, time to connect with people. Unfortunately, most of us put off the last four items for the sake of the first one.
As a teacher for fourteen years now, I have been successful in one area of my instruction without a doubt, making personal connections with my students. I have had other colleagues ask me: how do I make such great connections with my students, how do I get my students to complete work on time, how do I get my students to be respectful, how do I get them to open up and tell me so much about their lives? The easy answer is, time. The best way any of us can show we care about someone is to take time to listen.
Here are three easy ways to take time to make personal connections with your students:
1. Start of each day or even one day a week telling a story about yourself.
I always begin every Monday with asking students about their weekends, where did they go, what did they do? I ask them if any of them saw a new movie, had a sporting event, etc. In the beginning of the year I model this by asking these questions, but knowing they most likely will not answer, so I tell them about my weekend. Invariably, one of the students will speak up and share something and then another. It takes five minutes or sometimes more, but the dividends pay off in the long run. The students will know you care about them simply by taking the time to ask them about their lives and not only focusing on what they know about the course content. Once they tell you about what their interest are it is easier to make connections. Taking the time to do this is easy and a fun start to the week.
2. Brief conversations while checking off homework
I check off homework one to three times a week and use these opportunities for brief conversations with students. I do not speak to every student, every time or for very long, but these are still conversations that matter. I make comments about their soccer jersey, their hair, their shoes, the t-shirt with of their favorite band they are wearing. It is simply noticing people and making them the focus of the conversation. Of course, I notice their work and am I sure to mention when I see improvement in their work and genuinely convey my happiness in their work. To be honest, they care more that I notice them than their work, and in doing so, they begin to care more about their work.
3. Pay attention to the little things
When students walk in the room I focus on noticing any changes, slight or overt and making it a point to talk to the student about it at some time. I had a male student this past year who wore the same handful of shirts all year. When he came to class after Winter break with some new clothes I made sure to talk to him about them and tell them how great they looked. I had a student that wore automobile t-shirts and used his shirts as a conversation starter. When we began 20% time with technology projects every chapter he moved his passion for cars into his education( I will have more on my experience with 20% time in a future blog). When a female student made a significant change to her hair style by having a pixie cut (yes, I looked up what to call that type of haircut on a female as to not offend her), I told her in front of the class that "I like your hair." This small gesture helped her to open up and talk more in class from them on. When you take the time to notice people, they will appreciate the attention and give it back in your classroom.
The best way to make connections to your students is to be open, honest and genuine. Your students want to know you are a real person, with friends and family members. I enjoy sharing my life outside of school with my students and I find it even more enjoyable to know more about them. When each of us think back to our favorite teachers, they were the ones who cared about us, shared at least a little bit about their personal lives, but most of all, they took the time to care and listen.
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